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How to Ask About Suicide
Careful questions about this complex situation
Talking reduces risk
Medical research shows that asking directly about suicidal thoughts and talking openly about suicide reduces risk. Raising the issue does not increase harm.
Be gradual and gentle
Start conversations gently and become more specific over time.
Use our 10 guided questions to understand increasing levels of risk.Avoid discussing methods
Do not describe or discuss methods of self-harm, as this can spark ideas of how to attempt suicide in a more dangerous way.
Know when to add professional support
If what you hear feels worrying or overwhelming, involve professional help. You can seek advice from others without identifying the person at risk.
Be cautious with their promises
Promises not to self-harm, or not to repeat an attempt, are not always reliable, particularly if you are not close to the person.
Safety comes first despite your promises
When someone's life may be at risk, professional help must take priority, even if information needs to be shared. Many people are later grateful that action was taken during a period of distress.
If you are still worried:
- •If risk seems high, communication stops, or the person refuses help, contact a professional or crisis service yourself for advice.
- •Share the burden by confiding in trusted friends, keeping the person's identity confidential if appropriate.
- •With the person's agreement, reduce immediate risk by:
- ◦Limiting access to planned means
- ◦Leaving only small, medically appropriate amounts of prescribed medication
- ◦Removing car keys or alcohol where possible
If risk appears immediate or extreme, consider calling emergency services.
Helpful question you can ask:
"If our positions were reversed, and I had your problems, what would you advise me to do?"